The post office sent me this yesterday:
I don’t know if everyone got one, or just dog owners.
I know that my mutts love UPS because they carry around milkbones. They alert to the distinctive engine of the UPS trucks, and will literally run to any UPS person and beg for treats. I used to tease the UPS person that if they ever got out, I’d just come find the truck, and they’d be following it around. Turns out that wasn’t a joke – that actually happened. The gardener left the gate open. I got a call. They were on the UPS truck. She brought them home for me. Thanks, Jeannine! I called her supervisor to put in a good word. He thought it was great. UPS loves dogs[1]!
That’s a funny story.
The USPS guy on the other hand would have called the dog police. That would not have been so funny. Fines and dog jail at best. Mace and/or shot dogs at worst.
So why doesn’t the USPS carry around milkbones? Having the local dogs love you seems better than carrying around mace because you are afraid of them.
Of course there are still problem dogs that aren’t going to be bribed with a milkbone. The postal worker goes to every house every day. UPS just shows up when there’s a package. There’s a difference of scale.
Still, a difference of attitude.
[1] I’m not linking to the UPS dog page on that social network, but it’s there.
Smokers are assholes. I don’t know why, except I guess that if you feel it’s fine to pollute your lungs, the air, and everyone’s lungs around you, then it’s NBD to throw your butts anywhere, and everywhere. So you do.
Perhaps there’s some mythical smoker somewhere who gets rid of butts properly, but as long as I keep finding butts everywhere smokers congregate, and in random strange places, I just assume anyone who smokes is an asshole. I’m right so far.
Just like anyone who rides a loudass Harley in a residential neighborhood at 6 am. Asshole.
I can’t decide if vaping is worse. Try following one of those down a street. Holy cow, the smoke clouds. It’s like a WWI battleship making full steam to catch the Bismarck. You literally have to cross the street to get away from it. You’re an asshole.
But there’s no butts, so there’s that.
Continuing in the vein of positivity and not just bitching [1]
[1] Don’t worry I’ve got those coming up. Cf healthcare, driving, gray cars driving in the rain without lights, US shitty driving habits, ugly modern cars…
[2] Do not mix up.
[3] Well, I did. Pictures. I got it to show photos, when the first Retina display came out. It’s a wonderful portable portfolio device.
[4] Also no more people striking up conversations about the book I’m reading, or meeting people in bookstores…
[5] With the exception of skiing and climbing. I’ve had my fingerprints go away enough doing both that the screen wouldn’t swipe up.
[6] Which is why I don’t use the traveler apps from the US Gov’t, or sign up for Global or TSA Pre [7].
[7] Also because I get them greater than 50% of the time anyway, so why bother. Perhaps when I don’t have status anymore, but then I presumably won’t be flying that much anymore so…
[8] I’m not a libertarian, but the incentives are all wrong for anyone but Apple. Sad but true.
Adding to list:
I got a new bike. Not really because I wanted to1, but because it’s basically impossible to get replacement parts for the groupset on the old bike2, and replacing the groupset would require new wheels, and… for want of a nail, etc. At some point maybe it’s just better to put that money into a new rig. So the G&T said anyway late one night when I was surfing the intertubes and came across almost3 the bike I wanted for 20% off.
It’s a nice bike! I really enjoy riding it. Disk brakes are pretty awesome. As is a suspension on my old butt.
But the old bike is faster! I looked down today and saw that I was cranking up the hill at 90 rpm and 18.5 mph. Which is pretty fast for me and that hill. Usually I only hit 17 on a good day4. This is consistent. Me on old bike faster than me on new bike. It’s not double-blind but mostly I’m concentrating on not getting killed, and only marginally on how fast I’m going. Of course I’m always shooting for a new PR. But those are few and far between – it’s hard to beat that since it depends on traffic and lights.
I thought it was because the new bike with the big tires and the big wheels and the disk brakes and the monster wide frame5 are heavier. But data says the old bike is 8.13 kg. New bike is 8.30 kg. Not that much! Same amount of crap appended to both for the daily driver. The old bike has better wheels than stock, and a carbon seat post and drops, so maybe it’s a pound less than spec. The new bike sure feels heavier in the hand. But I guess I’ll have to find a different reason why the old bike feels faster. Maybe is faster, except Garmin has decided to stop updating the old Mac app and now I gotta go to the cloud to compare data. Fuck that.
I mean, the old bike was a Nice Bike, BITD. Maybe only one level down equivalent from the new bike, which is a Really Nice Bike, but not the Nicest6. But even only Kinda Nice Bikes these days are the equivalent of the old bike. Bikes are one of those things that have gotten way better.
Tagged 5200, bike, Domane, Trek, weight
I keep running into self-designated “trad” [1] climbers at well-known sport crags. They make their disdain of this bastardization of their religion clear [2] but so many of their friends do it, and seem to have fun, they grit their teeth and give it a try. But never let you forget that this isn’t “real” climbing, and they’d rather be in Yosemite [3]. Even if they’ve never been to Yosemite.
Never mind that every single person in the last three decades who has pushed trad standards higher has been a serious sport climber. Start with Piana/Skinner (Hueco, Wild Iris), Hill (World Cup Champion), Huber(s) (possible first 9a), etc. etc. etc. [4]. Jeff Lowe, one of the finest alpinists ever, was the first person to bring a sport climbing comp to the US, fer crissakes.
Just this week, I heard “But they don’t know how to place gear.” Again. [5]
Sigh. You have trouble placing gear, because you are weak and don’t know how to climb. If one can climb 5.15, and onsight 5.14, and the highest standard of trad climbing is low 5.14 but mostly way (way) less, then placing gear on anything less than that is not the thing holding one back. Anyone that good can learn to place gear, better than you, inside a few days in Yosemite.
“But they don’t know how to climb cracks”. Sigh. Climbing 5.13 cracks (8a) is just not a big deal if you can hang onto 9a or V14.
The truly strange thing about all these “trad” people slumming about Europe is they don’t really know how to climb trad. At least as far as I can tell from watching them sport climb. Liebacking is a lost art. It seems like they’ve never been taught to stem. They’ve clearly never climbed in Tuolumne or Tahquitz, because footwork is completely missing. Watching them try to smear up a delicate slab is like watching a duck paddle up a hill. Underclings are a complete mystery to them.
They mostly can’t even clip a quickdraw efficiently. Talk about knowing how to place gear – that’s the simplest part of trad placements when you’re pumped out of your mind and about to whip – can you get the fucking rope into the fucking carabiner.
God help them, they don’t know how to manage a rope so it doesn’t get fucked up, the most basic skill of moving fast on a real trad route – mountain, alpine, or wall.
Though often they have a permanently attached daisy chain [7] and a belay knife just in case a sun-bleached sling shows up at the top of a sport anchor – they’re 100% equipped to 100% handle that situation 100% of the time. Never mind that that will never happen in Siurana or Ceuse where they are slumming.
[1] Mostly they are self-defined as “trad” climbers because they don’t do anything else, not because they do it particularly well.
[2] To wit: “Sport climbing is neither.”
[3] Which the sport-climbing of trad anyway. Come on. The Nose is a 15 minute hike from your #vanlife. They never say “I’d rather be in the Dolomites” (or Alps or Patagonia or Alaska) – you know, where there is serious real trad to be had. If you can pay your dues.
[4] Yes, all those folks had serious trad experience. But they got strong by sport-climbing.
[5] You know, despite the evidence of Ondra coming and making short work of the Dawn Wall [6]. And Verhoeven the Nose. And, and, and…
[6] Not that Ondra didn’t have some serious trad experience – this wasn’t his first rodeo. But come on. Aside from a rainstorm, he almost onsighted the Nose. With his dad. As a warmup.
[7] What’s a daisy chain, ahem, “personal anchor system (PAS)”, most useful for? Signaling that this a person with whom you don’t want to climb. See also: belay knife, rappel device (esp. figure 8), prussik, and gym card.
When did “multipitch” become a thing? The same time “trad” became a verb? “Multipitch” is also verb, and adverb.
I can’t remember what we called it BITD. Just climbing, I think.
Borked
Thinking about it, if it’s not the weight, it could be:
Addressing points the latter though, I notice the speed difference powering up the hills mostly, where these have less effect. Though I also notice that I don’t hit speeds greater than 30 that much going down the hills, so maybe there’s something to it.
It’s pretty damn impressive that this big burly bike with a much stouter frame, disc brakes, etc., weighs the same as the old bike though.
Tagged bike, rantComment Comments Off on Borked Permalink