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Squirrels

This morning a squirrel fell out of the tree exactly in the midst of me and two dogs.  We were all surprised enough that he was able to get up and make it up the tree before either of the dogs could grab him.  Swish, THUD, about a foot in front of my face, and all four of us were equally surprised.

I’ve seen squirrels fall out of trees three times in the past five years.  Never before that.  I don’t know if it’s because I have gained some magical squirrel-paralyzing powers – I would have chosen a different mutant super-power, as I can see no way to either monetize this, or use it to take over the world.  The squirrels are only lightly stunned, and get up and run away, so it’s not a “get rid of squirrels” kind of pied-piperism (not that I want to, squirrels keep the dogs entertained, and I don’t have a bird feeder, so what do I care what the squirrels do?), nor does it happen at my mental command, so I can’t take out my enemies by having squirrels fall on their heads.  Yes, I’ve tried.  Even if I were successful, I would think “squirrel falling on head” is only annoying.  It is amusing as hell.